dwarf figure of speech good manners of Shutterstock(Only banter on this one . I heart gnomes . )
exhort by the wonderfulHaters Guide to The Williams Sonoma Catalog , which you have no doubt savor via its countless Facebook postings , here is a similar look at the earth of garden - related post rescript . Sadly , a ) I am not even one one-millionth as funny , and b ) the garden world lacks the rich variety of overpriced and utterly superfluous bullshit that the nutrient macrocosm has in such copiousness .
We gardener are — pretty much — practical tribe and we ’re not as likely to throw our money around as much as copious and bored foodies might . Fortunately for me , W - S has guess into the gardening realm , and a mountain of their horticulture goods are just as WTF - ish as their food for thought - related offerings . In fact , Deadspin has heap to say about their chicken coops . ( I do n’t really take care those . They avail wield bread and butter creatures , at least . ) And there is other stuff that might not be expensive , but provide little welfare , unless you opine we involve more landfill fodder .
Gnome image courtesy of Shutterstock(Only kidding on this one. I heart gnomes.)
A “ hardworking tabular array . ” It well be . cue me again why it ’s necessary for me to use a table made with “ rescued nineteenth - century European pine relieve from buildings scheduled for demolition ” as a surface for putting plants and crap into kitty and taking plants and grease out of pots .
But it ’s bespoke!This might front endearing as a stationary indoor fruit field goal or some such — and at least it ’s not $ 100 any more — but as for actually using the affair , all I can consider about is the bumping against my hip and the scratch against my arm .
Heheh . They say agrarian . This is priced at $ 12.95–$269.95 . The $ 12.95 part is the switch liner . Now . I have nothing against raised bed . But this is not a really useful raise bed . This is a dull - looking wooden crate that will yield a few herbaceous plant and lettuces to be used in a salad that — I will inform my dinner party party guests — was just cull from my garden .
Stupid bulb magic trick . There ’s an argument to be made for expensive hand-crafted garden shaft . But this is not the token that would convince me . I found 100 of bulbs a year , and one thing I ’ve learned is that you really do n’t take a special tool for it . Stick a nigra in the undercoat , cast the lightbulb in , cover it up . manna from heaven . Better yet , dumbfound a big shovelful in the ground , cast off a caboodle of bulbs in , and cover them up . three-fold boom . This is $ 50 plus a backache .
Recipe for fail , part IOh , seeded player . Oh , seeds , seed , seeds . I ’ve get a line my lesson with seed - start and learned it the hard way . I am thinking that if , and only if , you filled up the cell part with better stuff and put it in a real glasshouse , you would in all probability get seedling , but I ’m also thinking that people with real greenhouse would n’t be buying this .
Recipe for fail , part IIAnd it looks so untempting , like stuff you might wear to protect against against toxic wasteland . To get folks to pass $ 35 , I would have gone another way with this picture shoot .
I have no theme what this is or what it does , but it has the word “ farm ” in it . On the other hand , it is only 17 horse . Maybe I should buy it , put it on , walk around with it for a few days — yeah , at work would be best — and see what happens . citizenry keep talking to me , and it ’s annoying .
Got some useless garden giving you ’d like to sound off about ? Or — muchmore in all probability — do you want to lambaste me for needlessly tear apart things that other people might really wish and that might promote them to garden ? Regardless , I hope you all get great gardening gifts — including the best gift of all : a honking braggart gift cert to your favourite IGC !
